A Rice Sandwich

"In the canteen, which was nothing special, lots of boys and girls watched while I ate my sandwich, the bread already greasy and the rice cold." (Cisneros, The House on Mango Street, 45)

In this chapter of the book, Esperanza really wants to take a lunch and sit in the cafeteria instead of walking home to eat. She thought that the special kids got to eat there and that it was an important place. She goes through quite a bit of trouble to be able to take a lunch and eat in that special room. Eventually she finds out that it really isn't that cool and she doesn't belong there.

I could feel what she was going through because I went through a similar experience. Growing up my mom always made me a lunch to take to school. Many of the students who brought their own lunch, including myself, wanted so badly to eat a school lunch.I think that everyone who took a sack lunch to school can say that they wanted to have the school lunch at one time or another. The kids who got the cafeteria food got pizza, chicken, milk, and all sorts of cool lunch items. Us sack lunch kids got stuck with the same sandwich, an apple, and if we were lucky, a cookie. We all envied the kids who didn't have to carry a lunchpail to school, who got to have a choice in what they were going to eat for lunch. Eventually my mom gave in and gave me a few dollars to be able to pay for a lunch. I was super excited to finally have a school lunch and not a nasty sandwich. I got my food and sat with the other school lunch kids. I was completely let down. The food wasn't really that good and all my friends that I usually sat with were not with me. The next day I went back to a sack lunch and was grateful from that day on for a mom who made me a lunch.

I Like It!

I like it! I have really enjoyed this class, and most of what we have read or viewed. My favorite one though has been Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo Anaya.

I felt that I could really connect to Antonio in this story and that helped me learn from and enjoy this book. Antonio was forced to grow up quicker than he would have had he not experienced what he had. Antonio had to see three people killed right in front of him, try and earn the approval of his older brothers, and be a good student. Growing up my grandma, an aunt, and an uncle all died. I was the oldest nephew in the family and I had become close to them, having them pass forced me to learn about the reality of life and death at a young age. I am the oldest child in my family so I didn’t have older brothers to impress, but I had older cousins, uncles, grandpas, and a father that I felt like I needed to impress and gain their approval; something very important to me. I wanted my older family members to treat me like an equal and include me and eventually they did. We now share a strong bond and love because of the experiences we went through together. I have always tried to be a good student and have striven to be at the top of my class (something that has been real hard now that I’m at BYU). My father is a dentist and has been very successful at everything that he has done, this has always encouraged me to be at my best and match or exceed his accomplishments.

As Antonio went through his experiences and I through mine, I know that we have had to mature and grow up quicker than most other boys that we grew up with. As I read the end of Bless Me, Ultima I learned something new. I learned that growing up is all the things that I just wrote about, but it is also being able to form relationships in which you care about the other person more than you care about yourself. Antonio ran ten miles, just to try and save Ultima. I guess I still have some growing up to do.

Shadows and Dust

"The body is not important. It is made of dust; it is made of ashes. It is food for worms. The winds and waters dissolve it and scatter it to the four corners of the earth. In the end, what we care most for lasts only a brief lifetime, then there is eternity."
(Anaya, Bless Me Ultima, 203)

What insight from a little boy sitting in church on Ash Wednesday. He has understood the importance of eternity and the briefness of this mortal existence. Throughout life we grow up and all learn that we are really nothing; that there is something more than our bodies and our earthly greatness. We learn the importance of using this brief lifetime to prepare for the lengthiness of eternity.

Again I was pulled into thinking about one of my favorite movies, Gladiator.




Proximo, the owner of the gladiators, tells Maximus that we mortals are but "Shadows and dust." That's all we are, just this shell that we occupy and learn to control. We die and the bodies we have return to the shadows and become the dust we were made from. We worry about our bodies and our lives so much, but in the end, we are only mortal for a very short time.









Earlier in the movie Maximus speaks to his men and says, "What we do in life, echoes in eternity."  There was an understanding of the importance of going good and that this mortal life will eventually end. A man will be judged according to his works and his character. What we do and become in this life determines what and who we are in eternity.





We really need to comprehend the importance of the eternities along with our own nothingness and inability to become something without some help. I know that yes we are less than the dust of the earth, but we have the potential to make long lasting echoes in eternity as we learn, grow, and do incredible things for others. How are we setting ourselves up for eternity?

Who Is That Kid Anyway?

"I'll race you! I'll race you!" The Vitamin Kid pawed nervously at the ground. I never knew his real name, everyone just called him the Vitamin Kid, even the teachers at school. He could run, oh how he could run!
(Anaya, Bless Me Ultima, 36)

This was a moment of real nostalgia for me.

Since the time I was in 4th grade I have always been a runner. I ran cross country and track and I loved it. I was fast, confident, and enjoyed a good ole' fashion foot race. When it was time for my 5th grade year to start there was a new kid at school, just moved into the area, and everyone called him K-Mart. For the longest time I had no idea why they called him K-Mart, nor did I know his real name. He came out for the cross country team because he was too skinny for football and he was really good. I had a real challenge every race just to barely beat him. He and I got to be pretty close for the next few years until high school, then he moved away. In that time I learned that his real name was Jonathan and that the reason he was called K-Mart was because one week when he moved into town he only had one shirt, it was a white t-shirt that said K-Mart on it. The merciless elementary kids judged him and he lived with a mean nickname for the rest of his time there.

I had not thought about Jonathan for about 6 years, but when I read this part I was taken right back to grade school; meeting Jon, getting to know him, racing against him, and becoming friends. I feel like Rudolfo Anaya, he probably got the idea to include the Vitamin Kid in his story because it was someone that he knew. In the story of my life I can write about my own Vitamin Kid, K-Mart.

To tie this all back into Bless Me Ultima, my comment is that kids are mean! Kids don't take the time to actually learn other kid's name, they just judge each other and give mean nicknames. In the book a kid is called Horse because he looks like he got kicked by a horse, there is a kid named Bones, and kids with other crazy nicknames. Also in the book the kids fight each other just to fight. We called Jonathan K-Mart when we should have taken the time to actually learn his name in the beginning. I'm sure we all have a Vitamin Kid or a K-Mart in our lives, who's yours?

Buried In Our Obsessions

"The Mortar finally closed over the eyes of Henri Christophe, who now continued his slow decent into the entrails of a moisture that was growing less plastic. Then the corpse came to rest, one with the stone that imprisoned him." (The Kingdom of this World, Carpentier, 149-150)

I loved this part! As I read, I was amazed by how engrossed I became in what I was reading. Henri Christophe was the king and he was obsessed with building his kingdom and his fortress bigger, stronger, and more impenetrable. He was driven by the power he had as king;  he loved being able to control and do whatever he wanted to do. He captured slaves, killed people, sacrificed bulls, and whatever else it took to make the whole thing more grand and impressive. 

Eventually we read that King Henri killed himself and was buried in the mortar that was used to build this castle. He became one with the stone and one with his obsession. In life we did everything he could to build his empire and in death he was not separated from the desire. 

As I thought about this part of the story, I thought of The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. I thought of Gollum and his obsession with the ring, his obsession with the power that came with it. When he first found the ring he killed his best friend just to get it. He became obsessed with the ring and he continued to go to great lengths throughout the movies to obtain it. Eventually Gollum dies in the place of the ring's origin. He jumped into the lava of Mt. Doom just to get the ring. 

Gollum died along with his dream of having his "precious". He became one with the desire that took over his life. 

I continued to think about this topic and I know that we can also allow ourselves to become obsessed with certain unhealthy things in our lives. We can overwork and leave behind our families, we can spend more time with "the guys", than with our wives, and many other things that take away our lives and leave us with nothing in the end. What are the things in our lives that do this and how can we get rid of them?